I don't know what to do now.
I'm so lost, so confused.
I've become the monster that I always hated.
I find peace in the strangest place possible.
I never expected that she would be the one who'd clear my mind and let me think properly.
I find it amazing how, after all I've done to her, she'd still stick by me like that.
Thank you.
I didn't want it to be like this.
I didn't want to lose you like this.
As funny as it may seem, I miss you.
I don't know how that's even possible.
But I do.
shawty's movin' on with her life... [8]
I just don't understand...
It was brought to my attention that she's been flirting with another guy.
It makes me think that she never liked me in the first place.
That I was just a toy she kept herself busy with until she found someone else.
Someone younger, more like her.
She says that she doesn't want to be friends anymore, that we should stop talking...
I can't do that.
It's only been a day, and I've been tearing myself apart, trying to find it in me to stand up.
But I can't.
If I never met you, I wouldn't like you. If I didn't like you, I wouldn't love you. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't miss you. But I did, I do and I will.
I don't know what to do.
Is this another one of God's sick jokes?
Is this just another test of my strength in humanity?
My faith in those around me?
For three months, I have waited for my chance to be with her.
For three months, I have thought about what to say when the time came.
For three months...
It's funny... I was going to ask her out again later this week.
Just as we had planned.
We had decided on February.
We.
But now, my chances are gone.
In fact, the chances of her looking me in the eye are slim to none...
I'm back at square one.
I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone and still wanting to be with them more than any other person. Love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of. Love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak in the knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.
